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Pool boy candidacy
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Posted:May 26, 2005 9:45 am
Last Updated:Mar 5, 2006 9:27 pm
10775 Views
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Qualifications: Have been in many pools
Reason for running: The pool boy ALWAYS gets laid in porn movies.. I think it is my only hope here
Slogan: Ask not what your country can do for you; ask what you can do for me
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3
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Prayers for 2005
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Posted:May 26, 2005 9:08 am
Last Updated:Mar 5, 2006 9:27 pm
10702 Views
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FEMALE PRAYER FOR 2005:
Before I lay me down to sleep,
I pray for a man,
who's not a creep,
One who's handsome,
smart and strong,
One who loves to listen long,
One who thinks before he speaks,
One who'll call,
not wait for weeks.
I pray he's gainfully employed,
When I spend his cash,
won't be annoyed.
Pulls out my chair and opens my door,
Massages my back and begs to do more.
Oh! Send me a man who'll make love to my mind,
Knows what to answer to "how big is my behind?"
I pray that this man will love me to no end,
And always be my very best friend.
Amen.
MALE PRAYER FOR 2005:
I pray for a deaf-mute nymphomaniac
with huge boobs who owns a liquor store and a bass boat.
This doesn't rhyme and I don't give a shit!
Amen
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4
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Your body is a Temple
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Posted:May 25, 2005 5:55 am
Last Updated:Mar 5, 2006 9:27 pm
10743 Views
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Ok... then I must be a Buddhist.
You should get in shape
I am in shape.. round is a shape.
I love to see a guy at the beach with a nice "six pack"
Why settle for a six pack when you can have a keg?
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4
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Dawn of a new Dark Age?
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Posted:May 25, 2005 5:38 am
Last Updated:Mar 5, 2006 9:27 pm
10775 Views
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OK... another serious post. I was watching the news last night - something that I try to avoid - and "THE" topic on all of the stations was stem cell research. There were both proponents and opponents voicing their opinions. I am not much of a scholar of history, but I do know that the (original) Dark Ages was brought about by "The Church" banning all scientific discussion as "heresy" Most medical advances were lost and civilization basically had to start over in that department. It seems that we may be at the beginning of the same type of thought that brought about the Dark Ages. "W" seems to think that if stem cell research goes against his personal beliefs that it must be banned. The thought that religious belief should become law seems to be quite common. I probably would not have been agitated enough to write about it, but "W" had the balls to say (in defending his arguement against stem cell research) "I will not allocate public funds to the taking of life." I wish he had thought of that before we went to Iraq.
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3
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The perfect husband
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Posted:May 24, 2005 11:27 am
Last Updated:Mar 5, 2006 9:27 pm
10732 Views
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The Perfect Husband
Several men are in the locker room of a golf club. A cell phone on a bench rings and a man engages the hands free speaker-function and begins to talk. Everyone else in the room stops to listen.
MAN: "Hello"
WOMAN: "Honey, it's me. Are you at the club?"
MAN: "Yes"
WOMAN: "I am at the mall now and found this beautiful leather coat.
It's only $1,000. Is it OK if I buy it?"
MAN: "Sure, ..go ahead if you like it that much."
WOMAN: "I also stopped by the Mercedes dealership and saw the new 2005 models. I saw one I really liked."
MAN: "How much?"
WOMAN: "$90,000"
MAN: "OK, but for that price I want it with all the options."
WOMAN: "Great! Oh, and one more thing .... The house I wanted last year is back on the market. They're asking $950,000"
MAN: "Well, then go ahead and give them an offer of $900,000. They will probably take it. If not, we can go the extra 50 thousand. It's really a pretty good price."
WOMAN: "OK. I'll see you later! I love you so much!!"
MAN: "Bye! I love you, too."
The man hangs up. The other men in the locker room are staring at him in astonishment, mouths agape.....
He smiles and ask:
"Anyone know who this phone belongs to?"
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1
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I am feeling a little betrayed
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Posted:May 24, 2005 3:26 am
Last Updated:Mar 5, 2006 9:27 pm
10811 Views
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A while ago, I read a blog post that I wanted to follow. I forgot to click on the "watch this post" and could not remember the author or the exact title of the post.(CRS) I did a google search, found the post and noticed that it was posted on a site that I do not belong to. I meant to pursue this , but alas, CRS struck again. A recent blog post reminded me of it again. I am probably the last to find this out, but does everyone else realize that anything you post on either Gay Hookup Zone or passion.com shows up on BOTH sites? Did anyone actually read the terms of service? Is it stated there that your profile can be posted on other sites? Anyway.. I am probably the last to know.
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3
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Where to send your literary works
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Posted:May 19, 2005 12:27 pm
Last Updated:Mar 5, 2006 9:27 pm
10671 Views
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If you do not understand it, but can prove it, send it to the economics dept.
If you understand it, but cannot prove it, send it to the physics dept.
If you do not understand it, and cannot prove it, send it to the psychology dept.
Otherwise, post it on a blog site.
... And repost and repost and repost and repost and repost and repost and repost and repost and repos tand repost... til you do not get the dreaded denial message
I wish they would say exactly what is wrong with this post.. have cahnged it more times...
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0
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Whew!! .. I feel better now..some very BASIC things...
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Posted:May 19, 2005 10:35 am
Last Updated:Mar 5, 2006 9:27 pm
11156 Views
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...that you can do for( or not do TO ) your computer
Keep your virus definitions updated. Most have an option to auto update at given intervals or at certain times of the day.
Keep your adware/spyware updated. Same as above. Run often.
Keep your windows updates updated. Can be set to auto update.
Do not open an email from anyone that you do not know.
Do not download "cool" screen savers, wallpaper, games, or cute animated creatures that move across your screen.
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4
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A Day in the Life
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Posted:May 19, 2005 10:19 am
Last Updated:Mar 5, 2006 9:27 pm
10954 Views
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This "theme" is borrowed from a popular poster's blog.. the idea is from another popular poster's blog
...arrive at work..
..phone rings...
Me: Systems Office, this is _________
Them: Hi, _______ . I can't log on to the network
Me: Did you change your password?
Them: Why would I change my password?
Me: Did you get a message saying that your password is about to expire?
Them: Should I change my password?
Me: No. Did you get a message saying that your password is about to expire?
Them: Is my password going to expire?
Me: Not unless you got a message. Did you get a message saying that your password is about to expire?
Them: No.... I did everything just like I did yesterday. I got on yesterday.. now I can't.
Me: Is your caps lock on?
Them: Why would my caps lock be on?
Me: I don't know. Is it on?
Them: No.
Me: Ok.. I'll be right there.
(walks to his(her) office)
Me: Ok.. let's give it a try
Them: Ok.
Me: What's that little light?
Them: What little light?
Me: The one right under the words, "Caps Lock"
Them: OOoops. Who would turn my caps lock on?
Me: I don't know.
(returns to office)
.. phone rings...
Me: Systems office, this is ______
Them: Hi, ______. The laptop that I got from the loaner pool does not work.
Me: What's wrong?
Them: I plugged the overhead projector into it and it didn't work.
Me: Which did not work.. the projector or the laptop.
Them: The laptop worked, but it would not display on the overhead.
Me: Are you sure that you had the projector on?
Them: Yes.
Me: You pressed the function key and F7 and it did not switch to the overhead?
Them: What is the function key?
Me: It is between the control and the alt buttons on that model.
Them: So.. I need to press it and the F7 key at the same time?
Me: Yes.
Them: Nobody told me that. Why do they do that?
Me: I don't know...
...phone rings....
Me: Systems office, this is _____.
Them: My computer is dead.
Me: What's wrong?
Them: Nothing happens when I turn it on.
Me: When you press the "on" button, does the light come on?
Them: There's no light on my computer.
Me: In the middle of the on button, there is a tiny green light. Is it on?
Them: Oh that light. Yup it's on and nothing.
Me: Is the power light on the monitor on?
Them: No.
Me: Push the power button.
Them: Nothing.
Me: Is your monitor plugged in?
Them: Why wouldn't my monitor be plugged in?
Me: I don't know.
Them: Where does it plug in?
Me: In the box under your desk.
Them: There are 2 plugs. One is plugged in, one is not.
Me: Plug the other one in
Them: Which one?
Me: Plug in the one that is not plugged in, so that both plugs are in.
Them: OK..Now what?
Me: Press the power button on your monitor.
Them: It's on. Thanks. So...all that was wrong was that the monitor was unplugged?
Me: Yes.
Them: Who would unplug my monitor?
Me: I don't know.
...phone rings ...
Me: Systems office. This is _____.
Them: Hi, ______. This is _______. I need a document put on line. Are you the one I should talk to?
Me: Yes.
Them: OK.
Me: How big is the document?
Them: 132 pages.
Me: Ok.. that's probably too big to send me in an email. Can you put it on a disk and send it to me?
Them: I don't have it. It's in a book.
Me: Ok..can you send the book over to me?
Them: I don't have the book.
Me: Ok.. I'll get it from the library.
Them: The library doesn't have it. I checked yesterday.
Me: Ok.. I'll borrow it. What's the book?
Them: It's _______ by ________.
Me: OK..which pages or chapters do you need?
Them: The first 132 pages.
Me: Ok..when do you need it posted by?
Them: 4/30.
Me: MMMM..today is the 28th. I'm not sure that I can get it by the 30th.
Them: No, 4:30 today......
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0
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Just when you thought it was safe......
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Posted:May 18, 2005 9:53 am
Last Updated:Mar 5, 2006 9:27 pm
9022 Views
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I finally got an email. The only problem is.. when I click on "Read new mail" or whatever it says, I go to the inbox only to find that not only is the "new" email gone... but ALL of the emails are gone.... I LOVE this site
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3
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Blogs that rub me the wrong way..(at least I was rubbed)
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Posted:May 12, 2005 2:33 pm
Last Updated:Mar 5, 2006 9:27 pm
9394 Views
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There are a number of blog postings that fall into one of two general categories... "sex help directions" given by men, supposedly for men and "bitching" posts by women who complain about how rude, crude, and socially unacceptable some men are on Gay Hookup Zone.
With age comes wisdom (OK, I missed the boat on this one, but at least I made it to the dock to watch it sail) and with age comes a certain amount of cynicism (sp??). I have to say that , to me, it seems that these guys are saying, "have sex with me 'cause I know where your Graftenburg spot is" or "have sex with me 'cause I know how to lick your clit big time" or "have sex with me 'cause I am a beautiful sensitive person" or "have sex with me 'cause I can make you squirt"..etc., etc.
I have read a number of posts that complain about the manners that men use on this site. Many of the commenters are people who post blogs that I read regularly and have respect for their intellect. I have to ask, " Do you respond to all of the email that you receive?" The way that I was brought up, it would be considered rude to ignore an email. I realize that women receive volumns of email..but there are "quick" responses, autoreplies and email filteriing which would alert a potential emailer that (s)he "should not even bother". People that post "the moronic email of the week" or some variation of that are , in my opinion, worse than the "morons" that sent the offending email.
Another "bitch" I have is when men feel that they must defend "the honor of women of Gay Hookup Zone" . but I will deal with that at another time, if I remember
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To link to this blog (rm_bluegenes51) use [blog rm_bluegenes51] in your messages.
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