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Come in, sit down, chill out, take a break and enjoy the ride. You can ride it as often as you'd like, although there are no real guarantees where it will take you. Feel free to leave comments with the attendant, all maintenance requests will be taken under advisement. If you would like to speak with the manager of this ride please do so, however, keep in mind that he responds best to invitations from beautiful intelligent women. If you are not lucky enough to be one of these types of customers you may still leave a note, it will be read, eventually.
As usual keep hands and feet inside the ride at all times, if you have motion sickness or any aversions to intense physical activity this ride may not be for you.
The following symptoms are quite common after leaving this ride; weakness in the legs or arms, cramping of the ab muscles, shortness of breath, increased blood flow to the heart and pelvic regions, hand prints, bite marks, fluid loss, and full body tingling. Having any or all of these symptoms is a sign that the ride is working properly. The manager greatly appreciates repeat customers, in fact he prides himself on his superior service record and attention to customer satisfaction. However, as with all rides, there are certain parts that just can't be tweaked or otherwise altered in order to preserve the integrity of the ride itself.
Your comments, questions and thoughts are greatly appreciated and regardless of age or sex all comments will be read thoroughly by the attendant, so watch your mouth. Have a nice day!
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The Right Woman
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Posted:Dec 22, 2011 9:48 pm
Last Updated:Dec 27, 2011 7:10 pm
11961 Views
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Things I've learned about the perspectives of men and the women they are with:
1. With the right woman a man will avoid washing his sheets just to keep her smell around; with the wrong woman those sheets go in the washer quicker than the channel gets changed during NFL Sunday.
2. With the right woman a man will lie and make excuses to see her; with the wrong woman a man will lie and make excuses to avoid her.
3. When a man is sick, he wants the right woman to help him feel better; he wants the wrong woman to stay the hell away and leave him alone.
4. When she is sick, for the right woman he will go to the store and get her medicine and hold her hair when she pukes; for the wrong woman he will stay the hell away so she doesn't get him sick.
5. When the right woman leaves "stuff" in his house he'll find it cute and keep it for her until she returns, for the wrong woman he says, "Why can't this chick keep her shit together!" and it will likely find its way to the garbage can.
6. With the right woman a man will clean up before she comes over, for the wrong woman he'll leave it as is, if she wants to clean for him, great, if not, oh well.
7. With the right woman a man will willingly shower, shave, dress decently, take her out somewhere "nice" and pay without thinking twice about it, for the wrong woman, well, lets just say that even if all those things miraculously occur, he'll be wondering whether or not she's worth all that effort.
8. With the right woman a man will miss an important football game, for the wrong woman, he'll sit right there on the couch and pretend he didn't hear the phone ring.
9. With the right woman a man will admit he is wrong and apologize for it, the wrong woman will be lucky to get a "My bad baby."
10. With the right woman a man will break his back to make sure she's satisfied in bed, no matter how early he has to get up he's ready for round 2, 3, 8, whatever. He'll lick pussy for hours, 'til he can't talk in the morning, he'll try toys, creams, outfits, all kinds of stuff. With the wrong woman, he'll finish, roll over and go straight to sleep 'cause he's got to sleep for work in the morning.
After reading this hopefully none of you decided you are currently the "wrong woman" in your relationship.
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Older does not mean more mature
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Posted:Jul 10, 2011 6:30 pm
Last Updated:Dec 27, 2013 8:18 pm
11959 Views
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I met a woman through the instant messaging on here, we talked a little on Friday night and then again for a good while on Saturday afternoon. We had a lot of things in common, mostly sexual, and she invited me out with her and some friends to a bar in 5 points. I show up and we talk about world politics, history and she makes an attempt to teach me some German. We talked for over an hour, she goes outside for a smoke, and when she comes back invites me over to the next bar they were heading to. She and her friends leave, I finish my beer and head over. She's on the phone outside so I go in and grab a drink. After a while I go way in the back and find her getting off the phone in a very unhappy mood. She starts heading out and I follow, laying back a bit to give her some space. She talks to a few people, and seems to be getting more annoyed, she goes to the bar for a drink and I stand behind her and rub her back. She's obviously not happy, so she decides it's time to leave. I say goodbye to her and her friends, walk out to my car and go home. I send her a text telling her that I enjoyed our conversation and I'd like to see her again.
Now, I've been on my fair share of dates both good and bad, and I know that people bitch to their friends about stupid/crazy things that bad dates do. I've done it, we all have. However, I have never made up things about somebody I've gone out with just to make them look bad. I say this and give background to explain what happens next.
I went into a chat room today and see the girl I went out with last night talking shit about me. Apparently I made a remark about her "not looking German" during our conversation last night. Ok, I don't remember saying it, but it wouldn't surprise me if I did. We'd spoken for a while and I caught no hint of an accent, she sounded like a typical American woman. I have nothing against Europeans, but obviously it bothered her. I'm sorry, I screwed up.
Then she starts telling her chat friends that I was stalking her from the first bar to the second. "We even left and went to another bar, and guess who showed up?" I'm sorry, when you're on a "date" and they tell you they're leaving to go somewhere else, meet us over there, that's usually a sign that I'm supposed to come.
She then proceeds to tell everyone about how she had to get her friends to get me to leave. Her friends didn't say anything negative to me all night, and she didn't ask me to leave.
I normally don't flame people in writing, it's just not my style. I also have no problem with a girl saying that I wasn't a good date, everyone isn't going to like every person they go out with. But seriously, do we have to make things up? I would never have guessed that someone I found so sexy, intelligent, and fun last night would have gone to such lengths to make me sound like such an asshole.
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Flying High on Jet Black Wings
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Posted:Dec 23, 2010 6:01 pm
Last Updated:Jul 18, 2011 6:58 pm
12251 Views
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Dedicated to a one of a kind girl who I knew only briefly. Your struggle and fight touched me. Despite the circumstances between us I will always remember you and cherish the time we spent together. Hopefully your flight will lead to you a place of peace you were unable to attain in this life.
On these black wings
I fly away
I fly so high
I cannot see
These people here
Are not my friends
They only want to hurt me
I fight and fight
All on my own
With not a soul to save me
I have these pills
To help me fly
Fly straight up
To die
"Take these" they say
"You'll lose the pain"
"You'll make it go away"
To lose the pain
I take their offer
My "friends" they claim
Flying higher
Or falling faster
Now too hard to tell
Laying back, needing help
Wishing it would come
But no one's around
To sooth my pain
They're all here for them
To use my body
And my soul
To pull me down from flight
There are some
Who come too late
To get their pleasure
From my pain
Out for them
Not here for me
Coming around too late
He meets me there
Late at night
To take his full advantage
He treats me well
Not like the others
He takes his time with me
Holding tight
Talking soft
Spending time
With me
Not like the others
But still so wrong
Even though he tries
My pain so deep
No one can feel
I shove him to the side
I work and work
I fight and fight
So hurt
So long
Can't see it
When it comes
The same mistakes
I make again
Fighting for my life
All the others
Still around
Drinking, smoking, popping
All consumed
No where to go
I fear that all is lost
One last time
That boy again
He comes around to see me
He wants to help
I see he's true
But is it all a lie
Like all the others
His virtue gone
Looking for his share
Maybe
Maybe
Could it be
He tries so hard
Speaks so sweet
So not like the others
He listens
With a tender ear
With interest in his heart
But no
It cannot be
He can't possibly be real
So off I go
To fly by night
I spread my wings
Jump off the cliff
On Raven's Wings
I FLY!!!!!
Rest In Peace and Fly my dear.
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Soccer popularity
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Posted:Jul 11, 2010 2:17 pm
Last Updated:Jul 20, 2011 8:13 pm
12882 Views
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Soccer might possibly become more popular in the U.S. if the players spent more time upright than they do laying on the grass. I watched a good bit of the World Cup, including all of the final, and the grass got more action from the players than the ball did. And at one point one of the Spanish players was awarded a free kick after tripping over HIS OWN FEET, come on now. They flopped almost as much in this one game as Derek Fisher during the NBA finals.
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Watch your mouth!
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Posted:Jun 13, 2010 6:36 pm
Last Updated:Nov 23, 2012 5:12 am
12198 Views
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There are a lot of posts on this site dedicated to what women really mean when they say something.
Items such as, "We need to talk = I need to talk, you need to listen."
I have another one to add to the list that doesn't get a lot of mention, but could be very helpful.
When a guy says something to a woman, ususally either something that is poorly worded (offensively worded) or an overtly perverted wisecrack, if she responds inquisitively with, "You said it, so you tell me what it means?"
She's probably doing one of two things, either giving you a chance not to say something to piss her off, or giving you a chance to smooth something over and take your foot out of your mouth.
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"Blizzard" of 2010!
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Posted:Feb 14, 2010 4:51 pm
Last Updated:Dec 27, 2010 10:31 am
12087 Views
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Yeah, yeah, but it's a lot of snow for South Carolina, especially here in Columbia. I did get to play in it on Saturday before most of it melted, the last time we got anything like this I was a sophomore in high school and it stuck for 3 days.
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Cock Blocked!!!
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Posted:Jan 2, 2010 6:10 pm
Last Updated:Jul 18, 2011 6:59 pm
12812 Views
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The South Carolina Gamecocks lost to the Connecticut Huskies today in the papa johns bowl. This brings UCONN's total number of bowl wins in school history to 5, which unfortunately is 1 more than the 4 bowl games USC has won in it's history. While this may not sound like much, the bad part is that USC has been playing "major" college football for about 100 years. UCONN's program has only been in Division 1 (bowl subdivision) since 2002!
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Faking IT
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Posted:Dec 28, 2009 4:13 pm
Last Updated:Jul 18, 2011 7:00 pm
13185 Views
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You can lie about your feelings
You can try to hide your moans
You can hold your tongue in silence
When I ask about your love
You can keep it all inside
And try hard to pretend
But the one thing you can't hide
When all is said and done
Is that feeling deep within
That tells you this is right
The proof is there you see
For all the world to know
Because the one thing you can't hide
When I am done with you
The one thing you can't fake
Is the puddle on the sheets
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On Raven's Wings
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Posted:Dec 27, 2009 6:28 pm
Last Updated:Nov 23, 2012 5:13 am
13044 Views
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Let's see if Gay Hookup Zone can actually post this correctly on the 4th try!
Our bodies close
In music's rhythm
Only clothes between us
In that moment
I never thought
You'd be mine alone
We talked and danced
All through the night
I asked you home with me
You laughed and said
Not now, sweet boy
And ground your hips to mine
We parted ways
The night so cold
Going home alone
Weeks later once again
This time you were searching
For a body to be close to yours
And mine was more than willing
Wrapped up in you
Clothes come off
This dance was ours
Nothing in between
Your first words
"You Naked"
A demand I met in kind
You latched on tight
And sucked it to life
The feeling so intense
Your lips on tight
Tongue swirling right
Base gripped by hand
Head between your lips
How long I held
With all my might
'til I could take no more
Hands in hair
Down you go
No more teasing here
Surging forth
You suck me down
As I twitch and spasm
Feels so good
Been so long
It's your turn
Now you'll see
I kissed your wings
Went down your vines
Until I found your flower
So soft and sweet
It's nectar gave me power
Creating puddles on the sheets
And a writhing moaning girl
Tongue pressed hard
Wiggling wildly
Holding your hips to me
Flicking, floating, flailing
Returning your great favor
We sit and talk
A little while
Resting for the finish
Hands still roaming
Skin so soft
Your body's works of art
On Raven's wings
I can't recall them all
Each piece a story
Told on skin
Now for me to see
Before me now
I take you in
A vision of perfection
Small and sweet
Toned and firm
Like tiny apple blossoms
To my lips
I press your skin
Across your back I roam
The time is now
You will be mine
Open up for me
Slide in deep
Slow and soft
Get you used to me
On your back
Between your legs
You entwined with me
Holding tight
Not letting go
Diving deep in you
Climbing high to meet me
Bucking hips to mine
I take you how I want you
Harder, faster, tighter
You moan out loud
A climax growing
One for both of us
My skin on fire
Needing release
Not wanting this to end
You feel so good
So warm and wet
It's been so long for me
To hold you tight is all I want
But release is what I need
Grabbing hard
Squeezing tight
I lift you up to me
Faster, faster
Moan for me
Let me know you're there
Getting close
So ready now
I know our time is short
Pounding hard
Fucking fast
Needing you so bad
I take you down
And fill you up
You got me off at last
Lie there thinking
No not now
It's time for you to go
Let's play some more
Don't go, not now
I want to know you more
So cute and tight
So soft and sweet
Your skin invites me in
But alas
It's not to be
Your time with me is up
Hopeing this is not
The last I'll see of you
Our time so good
It felt so right
But could have been so wrong
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Unwrapping the perfect gift six years in the making!
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Posted:Dec 20, 2009 10:52 pm
Last Updated:Jul 10, 2011 6:22 pm
12883 Views
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Last year my best friend gave me the best Christmas present ever. For a little background information, I've known this girl for 7 years, when we first met I fell extremely hard for her, unfortunately (as she continues to tell me) I wasn't the kind of guy she wanted to date. For those of you that know me, I can be very stubborn when it comes to getting something I really really want, so I kept pursuing in a much more toned down manner.
We settled into a pattern, when we were both single we were make out/cuddle buddies because we both crave physical contact. She was a virgin and wanted to stay that way, but we did pretty much everything short of sex. When one of us was dating someone we cut all that out and did the normal friends stuff.
This pattern went on for a long time, we've slept in the same bed more times than I can count, under these types of circumstances I try to come prepared, but with her that wasn't an issue. So when I drove up to spend a few days with her last December I didn't bring any condoms.
We hung out, she cooked me dinner, we watched a movie and went to sleep cuddled up in her bed. The next morning as we were kissing and wrestling around she asked me if I wanted to. I was confused, I thought I knew what she was talking about, but I was honestly to surprised to believe it. She was in fact serious and she did want to have sex, however, with no condoms and her not being on birth control it was going to have to wait.
We went on about our day like that question hadn't been asked, but when she went to get her prescription filled I snuck away to get some supplies for that evening, hoping that I hadn't missed what might possibly be my only opportunity.
After dinner and a movie, we lit a fire and turned on the Christmas tree and the sparks started flying again. After about 4 rounds of strip poker (her idea I swear) she asked if I still wanted to and if I had gotten what we needed.
So right there on her apartment floor, in between the roaring fire and the Christmas tree we "made love" really! I probably spent the first 5 minutes drifting between "is this a dream" and "this is your one shot, don't fuck it up." Then I realized that I had waited so long for this, I was going to make it good for both of us.
She was warm and wet, and we wrapped ourselves up in each other for what seemed like hours. We had dry humped with each other for so long we knew exactly how to move with together. And making out without sex for so many years we knew all the right spots to hit outside of the obvious.
It was absolutely amazing and when we both finished we lay there entangled, sweaty, talking, until she got cold, she's almost always cold.
You've heard people and movies say that when you want something so bad for so long you build it up so high that the real thing can't possibly be as good as the fantasy? Well in this case, that was not true. The real thing was every bit as good as the fantasy.
We've slept in the same bed 4-5 times since and there has been no more sex, she is now dating a guy long distance, she still claims that "I'm not her type." We are still good friends and will continue to be, and while that was probably my one and only shot, from now on when I go see her, I make sure to come prepared. Just in case.
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Picture with a Pornstar!
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Posted:Aug 14, 2009 1:14 am
Last Updated:Aug 14, 2009 5:35 pm
12218 Views
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Shyla Stylez was performing at Heartbreakers tonight, I got a very hot picture with me and her, they were only taking polaroids so as soon as I get it scanned into the computer I'll post it. I got a lap dance from her too, the girl is tiny but she packs a hell of a punch. She is a powerful dancer. Possibly because she eats her daily allowance of fruit too, she shared her strawberries straight out of her mouth! I've met a few girls in porn before, and there is definitely a reason that this girl wins awards and makes a ton of money. DAMN!! And for those of you who may be googling her now, she's no skinny stick, props to the women who have meat on their bones and know how to handle themselves.
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To link to this blog (rm_intelsxym4u) use [blog rm_intelsxym4u] in your messages.
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